Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
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