his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
