I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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