He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
