I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
