That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
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all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I want to be your penis for a week.
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you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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