The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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