these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
