We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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