I love black thongs
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize