just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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