found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
You left your phone here
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