i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
