Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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