Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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