Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Randomize
