Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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