dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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