dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
