Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Your penis caused this!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
