we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it