I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.