The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
