there's paper in my vomit.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
