3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize