I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize