Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize