Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize