Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
