He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
He kissed a someone with a penis
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
