You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
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