You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
