wat bout pragnant strippers??
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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