Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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