Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
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