Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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