I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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