I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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