problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
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