I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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