Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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