apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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