I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize