did you get engaged???
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
