forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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