bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize