we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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