You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
