Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
