About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
