you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize