I'm eating all of the evidence.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
